'The fantasies have been a good escape for me thus far, but sometimes leave me frustrated knowing they can never be real. '

You are right, fantasies are an escape and they can never be real.

^^^^^

When we use the mask of perfection or helplessness, when we go into hiding from the parts of ourselves we do not like, when we reject our inner child, we create a world of fear and self-judgment, where there should have been unconditional love and self-acceptance.