Keb, I have said exactly the same thing. My cousin's husband asked me what I had been doing during a long period of very dark depression.

"Trying to breathe," I said.

He confessed he had some depressive periods himself, and he understood what I meant.

Depression is a serious, serious illness. I believe the correct statistic is that about 10% of us commit suicide, so it is a disease that kills. It is not something that is "just in our heads," and it's not a matter of willpower, as my mother continues to insist, to overcome it.

Please congratulate yourself for each breath you take. For remembering to take a shower. Or to brush your teeth. Or to step on the porch for some fresh air. Or to change out of pajamas, not matter how late in the day. (At my worst, I can sweat clothes that I could live in, so the neighbors wouldn't know I was still in my pjs.)

These little things that are nothing to other people are triumphs for us during a depression.

Keep going keb, and keep posting.

KEB