Parents approval we always want but some I us never receive. I stopped trying for their approval long ago. I knew I would never get it and they were too self absorbed. Instead I ostrisized myself from the family and no longer speak with anyone. Most can't do what I did but I'm emotionally closed off which is something in working on easing up on. T and Pdoc were with me though in cutting family off, they are extremely negative and made me hate myself and want to die. So it was for the best.

Don't be too hard on urself. It's not ur issue ur mother I that way it is hers. Find others who like and respect u. We can't help the family we were born Ito but we can create our own through friends. All u need are a few and they can be better than family.