So, i only took my risperidone 3 days and i stopped doing it. I felt like i could do it my way and things would get better. Like it was all about me trying to improve every aspect of my life and i would have no problem anymore.

I even started losing weight and yesterday i started going to te gym but today i feel so... bad. like i want to cry but i feel like if i let myself fall again into depression, i would've failed.

I'm tired of being a mess. I want to be ok. I'm so sad rigt now... i'm gonna wait for tomorrow to see if it was just a bad day... I don't want to take meds.

I don't want to talk to anyone cause i'm supposed to be trying to get better by myself.