You are right...it is very difficult to do because it's just like an addiction & your mind has become addicted with those thoughts & actions in place of like an addiction to drugs or smoking or alcohol.....but if you honestly look at your ED.....it has the same place in your life as those addictions have in other people who are addicted to them....it becomes their whole life.

Breaking an addiction or even a habbit is very difficult & takes a lot of time & repetition of doing what it is you really don't feel like doing & what you haven't done for a long time or maybe even never.....it's a learning process & then an action repetition of the new behavior to make the change happen......that's why it's sooooo very difficult....but it CAN BE DONE if you really want it.

DBT has a term "opposite action urge".......which means that you go against what your urge is & do the action you know you really need to do.

Looking at it as a challenge can sometimes help.....but I know that when some people are challenged, they give up & say "I can't" where some of us take a challenge & say......"I can do it even if you think I can't......I'll prove it to you".

You can do it & having good encouragement can really help. Maybe you can get your T to be more of an encouragement if you approach her with that concept rather than the tough love approach, it might be better as she will know that you are really wanting to try rather than to fight against it.