After how many months, or has it passed a year already, of a constant and terrible low, I finally feel okay. That's more that I could ask for. However. This state has been achieved by suppressing my feelings. I don't expect it to last long, but it's like a breath of fresh air after breathing polluted air for all this time. Also, feeling like this with this method will probably bring me a terrible crash later. Don't know if my current state is good or not.