Yes .. Step off the train, it sucks and it just goes in a circle.

I really struggled with the same stuff a few years ago. I was convinced I had to forgive myself for every single thing I have ever done or not done that wasn't "right or perfect" It's a horrible cycle to be in. That is Bipolar lying.

I talked to my T at the time and he went down the road of forgive yourself and things will get better.. Okay , tried it , tried , kept trying , Nope not working , all.

Saw T the next week and I was so sad and felt so defeated and thought I would never ever have a chance at even a semi happy life , I burst into tears I went through half a box of tissues.. Finally semi composed myself and my T leaned over and said "Just quit it" Hu ? what ? He said "Get over it" wha?????????? ... He said ok so forgiving yourself isn't working for you , so leave your guilt here in my office and go live your life...

Yeah weird hu? He asked me to write " I forgive myself and I am letting myself off the hook" I did and then I put it through his shredder and I felt like a huge weight was liftted, I no longer looked back and thought of all the things I wasn't doing. I started with a clean slate..

Being able to just start over .. kinda like a "reboot" on your computer is a wonderful gift to give yourself, no one else can give you a gift like that. So now you help her with the next homework, dont think of all the ones you missed , that's gone and over with, You can help her with this brand new one. Live in the present, use mindfulness to stick you there.

At times the guilt can and will pop up and smack you.. Its Okay. See it for what it is and move forward.

No one knows what life is going bring to us, but we can "deal " with how we "allow" ourselves "react "to it.

It's time for you to get a reboot, start over,clean slate. Give yourself that gift