Firstly. You're not crazy. You're transitioning through an episode.

Your thoughts are simply congruent with your current mood.

Do you really think it could just be guys who would find it difficult to express their feelings in a therapeutic situation? Last time I checked I was female (erm) and I can have a hard time sometimes expressing how I really feel. Sometimes I don't quite know what's causing it.

Forget about quick improvement. Nope. Ain't going to happen. This is a lifelong situation and sometimes we will be well and sometimes we will not be well and will require more support.

You keep being compliant with your meds. You keep seeing your pdoc and your T. Especially now. You're not in a good place right now and your support team are there to help you.

I'm sorry that you are feeling this way.