I can't totally relate to extreme ups and downs, however it was not until I started receiving medications my mood swing started to level. Then I understood and thought about how ugly I had verbally been (not too many curse words or demeaning her) and God only knows why she stayed with me for about eighteen years. I'm ashamed for my past with my wife, and many things I did before marriage. I was a high school bully. My medications worked early on, but if I read you right, yours still need adjusting. Too often I read people having such problems. It must be very hard when medications do not work as intended. I think it helped I gave up any self medication like alcohol. All this may of be no value to you, but I am glad I can come here and share with others like wise. I keep to myself and do not tell others I am BP.