I have found that I usually feel unsafe with a therapist, especially at first, but I try to go a few times before I make a decision. I've tried about 8 over the years (and through several moves). I've felt comfortable with 2 of them.

I go through times when I just don't feel up to the effort of going and I quit for awhile. I tell myself that I am on vacation in Denial-land. Everybody needs a vacation sometimes! But then I eventually go back.

After my most recent move, I think I tried 3 or 4 therapists over a period of about a year before I found one I was comfortable with. I didn't start right out with them talking about my traumas. I started with stuff that was easier to talk about, just to get a feel of what the therapist was like. It was less tiring that way and it was easier on both of us to "break the ice" that way.

I'm happy with the therapist I have now. It was a lot of effort to find her. We've had our ups and downs, especially at first, but I realized that sometimes that was just me being hyper-critical as a defense mechanism. Now we have a very good relationship. I'm glad I stuck with it.

My advice would be feel free to take a vacation from the process if it is getting too tiring, but don't give up. Eventually you will find the right person.