Hi Appalachian, you're absolutely right, you need to be doing what feels right for you.
And you know at some point that may change..........but it does sound from what you said, like something you just needed to try.
And hey, while you're deciding you don't want to go there again (and that's absolutely fine!!!) just don't forget to give yourself the credit you're due as well!!!!
Come on it wasn't all bad was it??? And I personally, see some achievement in there!!!
So try to look back on it as you did break down some barriers, but just not right for you, right now???
And keep rolling with the what feels right for you, hey??!!
Alison