I have not yet fully accepted all of my past in therapy but I'm working on it. One of the things I have struggled with is calling the abuse I suffered abuse. My T works with me to accept myself just as I am, right here in this moment. And when appropriate, he gently reminds me that what I went through was abuse at the hands of a very selfish mother. I am currently finding that the more I work on just accepting myself, the easier it gets to accept my past. Not that any of this is easy and not that I have fully accepted what happened to me. As Lanie said, sometimes the best we can do is come to terms with what happened. For me, coming to terms with the past is accepting that it really was abuse and that it was NOT my fault. I'm also beginning to let go of some of my shame because in therapy, I get to be a relationship with someone who cares about me, knows all my secrets, and still accepts me just the way I am. Having someone fully accept you and genuinely care goes a long way towards moving out of that shame. If you can get that in other relationships, great. For me, therapy has been the best way to address my past and start to move forward.