I am so glad I found this forum! I am not alone in how I feel. I can't say the words either. No one in my family or work knows I'm seeing a T and no one knows I was abused except my T. When he asks me to share an experience (for example after a flashback), the words won't come out. My brain kind of shuts down and I see gray. So I write it down. If I'm feeling particularly strong I whisper it to myself in an empty room. This is after seeing this T for a year and it is progress. What I have learned is take things at your own pace and do what feels right to you. It will come when you are ready.