Deep breaths.. I know you're situation sucks. I'm in a marriage that is moving forward from infidelity also, except I was the person who stepped out. It's been a little less than a year and we still occasionally have our outs about it.
We started marriage counseling, among other therapy for myself. We both had to decide if it was worth it to our own selves before we could begin to get past it.

I think it's crucial that he be as honest about everything as he possibly can and understand that the tiniest fib may be a deal breaker on your part. I know it sounds corny but getting a poster board and writing out the deal breakers for you both helps that way your expectations are crystal clear.

Do you feel he's still trustworthy?