(((Alisha))),

It's so nice to know you have made so much progress and more capable to getting back to living your life. Yes, what you are embracing is an important part of the healing and it takes time for a person to find their way towards the very realization that you have shared here.

There is always going to be feeling the "absence" when someone loved has passed away.
However, gradually, as you have discribed so well, is realizing how much that person really "is" a part of you and how you never really "lose" that. You have the right to grieve his loss, but also knowing that he would want you to also live on too, along with that "living on" the person really "does" stay a part of you.

((Caring Hugs))
OE