I'm almost positive that something is not quite right with my romantic/sexual trigger centers, I don't find anyone attractive much anymore. Maybe it's me internalizing the feeling of being unattractive so that I don't see anyone else as unattractive?

Plus, it seems like each day I feel differently about my situation and my other emotions. Yesterday, I couldn't give a crap about anything. My husband asked me what was wrong because I hadn't said much all day, and all I could say was "I just don't feel very talkative." Then later that night, his mother informed me that his Nana's cancer has metastasized to her blood and I had no reaction at all, I didn't feel anything.

Today, I feel guilty about how I failed to respond to something like that. Today I also feel like maybe my husband isn't feeling very attractive either and maybe I need to cut him some slack? I don't know. I just feel so scattered all the time.

I do like the idea of individual counseling, though. I think we would both benefit from talking to someone without the other in the room.

Ugh, I'm so lost.