This.

Same situation with my mother who thinks I am mean and hateful and can't see all the wonderful things she did for me. Never mind that she is narcissistic and abusive. She doesn't see any of that. She sees herself as the perfect mother. Which she is not.

I have chosen to limit contact for my own sanity, not because she acknowledges that she did anything wrong. There is an unexplainable ickiness about that relationship. Sometimes I just want to vomit when I have to spend more than a few minutes with her. I do spend holidays and birthdays with her but that is all. Anything more than that would be too much. I can't bring myself to cut off all contact because that would be too painful for me right now. I do limit contact though and that is about my needs, not hers. I have chosen to put my own needs first for once and not feel guilty about that. It is a work in progress, that's for sure.