Shadows--your last post made sense. I'm not mad at you for confusing me--it has nothing to do with you personally. I was stating that I too was confused--no blame, no faulting--my own state of mind. Sorry you felt hurt.

My own experience of Insider attacking Insider on the inside as well as on the outside provided a very unsafe state for us. Ppl who didn't understand just thought I was being "self-destructive"--they wouldn't even want to know about my inside world.
Those that do know and understand were interested in what was happening because what went on inside carried onto the outside.
That doesn't always happen.
Not many ppl know I have DID and I like to keep it that way. Of those who do know it is only 3, my H, my T and a very close friend, who even care about both sides. My thought is that it doesn't really concern anyone else.
w_i