Hi PianogirlPlays, it must have been a very worrying and upsetting time having your husband close to surgery and I'm sure you could have done with some support at that time and especially if you were trying to stay strong for your husband???
But do you think that your daughter was very emotional because her father (??) was going through such a big thing??? If he is her father/he means something to her??? Perhaps scared, upset, looking to lash out at someone............???
Sometimes in that sort of situation (if nothing else works) you just need to distance yourself, in the interests of yourself and your husband. And maybe now you could work on distancing yourself (emotionally) from what was said..........you were all maybe having a really hard time???
Perhaps when you're ready you could contact her and you could support each other (if only a little??!!) .........but for now, maybe time to try to turn more of your attention onto yourself and your husband???
Hope your husband is recovering, and hope that you're doing just a bit better today........but here if you need to talk.

Alison