Thank you everyone for responding to this thread. It was helpful. To clarify, my suicidal ness isn't like a plan or active thoughts. It's more like when a person has bad diabetes and they purposely eat more sugar to hurt themselves. That is what I do. I don't want to give away too many details as I don't want t to find me here. T was mad that I was doing this bad behavior but t has known for a long time. It's not new information.