It is true that the T relationship cannot be replicated IRL for adults (though ideally it should for children). Friendships and intimate relationships require give and take. If I talk to a friend about my problems, she will in turn talk to me about hers. Now, if I am unable to listen to her because I am too caught up in my own stuff we won't be friends for very long - it gets old meeting someone else's needs all the time and never having yours met in turn.
The purpose of the T relationship is in part to help us get to a place where we can handle that give and take. We work with the entire focus on us until we have matured enough to be able to function in adult relationships. Some of us will need ongoing support to maintain that functionality, but the need will be nothing like as intense as it once was.
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'...
At poor peace I sing
To you strangers (though song
Is a burning and crested act,
The fire of birds in
The world's turning wood,
For my sawn, splay sounds,)
...'
Dylan Thomas, Author's Prologue
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