I am in a lot of pain today. But it's getting better.

For the past two weeks, I've been dealing with a lot of pain from existential crisis and recently, I realized it was DP/DR. I haven't eaten very much at all, and I fear even being awake. My own existence terrifies me.

And I know why. I've dealt with so much death this year. I need to learn to cope with it or I'll never get out of this. I need to learn to stop fearing it, and the rest of it will go away.

I'm just sort of jarred and scared today. I hate having this, but it's only temporary.