Hello!

I need some assistance with my issue of what seems to be sabotaging my own relationships (not intentionally). Everyone who is close to me I end up pushing away somehow. Roommates, college friends, high school friends. If I'm being totally honest I think that when I see someone (another female) as a threat I go into defense mode and start fights to keep them away.

Also, if I do have fights with people and a third party mutual friend doesn't side with me or support me, I begin to hate them too and eventually write them off.

The only person I have left by the grace of God is my boyfriend. I always pick fights with him but luckily he does stay around. If I lost him I don't know what I would do.

How can I just relax and not push everyone away? How can I muster up some confidence to just let things happen and not freak out at my boyfriend over every little thing. If someone happened to our relationship, I would just have lost everything.