Okay honestly I was abusive at one point in my life without meaning to be. I didn't really realize it. I was just trying to keep him from leaving me. I had an intense fear of being alone. I also struggle with mental health issues, and I struggled with addiction. In that particular relationship It was a back and forth thing. At first I was pretty horrible, and then I tried getting help. and then He started to become abusive due to resentment, drinking, jealously and hositlity. He told me he would change. He told me he would never hit me again. called me baby, seemed like he felt awful for what he had done, and then there were other times i would be sitting on our bed with the blanket wrapped around me balling my eyes out, and it seemed like it didn't even phase him that he had hit me. he would get so angry he would forget why he was angry. he was a different person when he drank. There was also times where he would deny even hitting me. Like your situation I was told I was crazy, and that I was going to die alone.

That was his way of making me feel like crap about myself so I didn't leave. He was also a very spiteful man. Regardless your relationship sounds so unhealthy. I loved my ex. Something horrible and traumatic had to happen in order for us to keep our distance from each other. This man has taken my home from me, put me in jail for false accusations, and put me in shelters. Months later I am dealing with the aftermath of our relationship. I'm pregnant, and looking at jail time. Please sweetheart. Stay away. things will only get worse. It never gets better. Now he's going to be holding resentment deep inside from the pictures you sent out. He may be telling you that he forgives you, and loves you but it's all crap he's feeding you to make you stay.

you are worth so much more than how he's treating you. You do not want to have kids with this man, if he'll hurt you, he will hurt your child. tell him to go find someone else to abuse, and move on with your life. go to counselling, make friends, build your own life, educate yourself on abusive men and know the red flags so you know when to stay away, when the next guy comes around. trust me as much as I have been through, I am a lot stronger now. I'm independent, and I am a work in progress. Yes it will be lonely for awhile, but you will be thankful you don't have someone making you feel like crap about yourself, when you already beat yourself up enough as it already is. If you need someone to talk to, msg me anytime
take care of yourself