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Originally Posted by Maimster123
Yes my current husband is aware of everything. He's helped a lot. We had a swingers night and while he's open to that he of course isn't open to my having affairs without him. He understands that a sense of "normalcy" is unique to each person but also believes that I should be able to do without other lovers.
I want to provide this for him, but my fear of not being able to literally keeps me in the house.
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I think you have gotten very good advice and the book recommendations sound interesting. Maybe read them WITH the H? Since there are soooo many flavors of open relationships, maybe he is into some and you are into others and there is some overlap between you and him (it appears that swingers nights could be that overlap)?
It is quite clear that the current arrangement is doomed - one day you'd leave the house, and... things will start happening. You cannot be under a self-imposed house arrest for the rest of your life, nor would it be "normal" even if you could.
The most problematic in the whole situation is his use of the word "should" when applied to you.