hi maggiepot
it must be horrible to live this way, never knowing when your illness will act up. since it is brought on by stress I would look into practicing a stress free lifestyle. check out yoga, mindfulness and stuff like that and really get yourself in a good place so that you are able to tackle any kind of stressor that comes at you in the world so that you feel safe to go out and do ordinary things, welcome to psych central. you will find we have several forums where you can post about your concerns and receive feedback from other members. you will get a lot of support here. again, welcome