If you are in abusive relationship and experience years and years of abuse, meds alone will not fix it.

You need to get out the place that suffocates you and work on your past issues as well. Meds can help, but don't imagine that taking the right pill will make your environment bearable, your past melt away and give you the balls to be the person who you want to be. It will be a lot and lot of hard work to get there.