I've contacted my psych and told him I'd like to modify my bedtime meds to see if I can get back to my "normal" sleep patterns. I've got to get off Seroquel. I have a reaction to it that makes me very irritable and cold. It's so unfair to my wife.

The thing is...my whole routine has been derailed for about 3 weeks now. I know routine is extremely important for those of us who are bipolar.

As far as triggers, I've been really frustrated because I didn't catch the sleeping problem. I thought that the insomnia was a symptom of my depression...but I didn't realize I wasn't "needing" the sleep. I just knew I wasn't getting any. And I totally missed other triggers that if I had seen someone else in the same situation I'd bet they were hypo instead of depressed. For instance, 2 week's ago I bought 2 brand new MINI Coopers. One for my wife and one for me. DUH! I can afford them, but I didn't haggle or anything...I just went in and said I want that one and that one.

I don't know...I just feel like I'm getting worse rather than better. I was on a pretty good roll there. I am very detail oriented and analytical. I'm in the computer industry, so it kind of comes with the environment. So I've been keeping track of a lot of things so I could find patterns and triggers. I thought I almost had it down to where I could almost control my moods because I could head off the depression or hypomania before it happened. But now...I have no idea. It's frustrating.

I've never been the type to join and post in forums. But being able to read what other people who are like me are feeling and experiencing is like I've found the Rosetta Stone. It seems we speak a different language...and somebody can understand what I'm trying to say even though I'm painting pictures that others can't seem to "get". That alone has made me feel so good it's hard to find the words.

At any rate, hopefully my doc (who is a genius) can get my meds straight so I can get back into my circadian rhythm (as my therapist list to call it) and get back on my routine.