One day at a time. I, and I am sure many others, understand that lonely and intense and numb place. Do one thing to attempt to be kind to yourself or to reach out, one small thing, regardless or in spite of, how you feel. DO something.....do something kind for a stranger, check out online boards that have people who are dealing with food as love, watch or read something that could be inspiring or funny or just distracting, sit silently for one minute and check in with your body, take a long shower and let the water help you feel present for one minute.

I think we are all learning how to "feed" ourselves better......How to be well "fed" in life? - now there is a question that takes true courage to seek the answer. And an answer that requires having patience with ourselves while we work it out and stumble around - and then forgiving ourselves for stumbling.

Your trauma is intense. Validate that. We do tend to take it out on ourselves, don't we? People may not understand what you have been through - but there are people and therapists that will. Find them!