When I'm depressed it's hard to take even the smallest step to get healthier. And then I feel even worse. And I just can't seem to imagine things will get better. A couple of times this has gotten really bad and I tried to just numb myself with food to get through the days. Sometimes I've tried to ride through it on my own and sometimes my psychiatrist would suggest a change in meds (strength or type) and I'd be able to start doing things again. I know that telling others about where I am almost always helps. So that's what I'm trying now. I'm grateful that I can still raise up enough hope to try to move in a somewhat healthier direction. I worry that my body won't be able to last long enough while I keep trying and changing. So for know I'm keeping a focus on learning what I can do to at least stay hopeful another few days and I'll worry about how to do the other things I need to later.