This is just to inform you that I am still alive and not plotting evil and ingenious ways to go insane. I am just getting used to the notion that there is a Psych Central again. When it went down, it was like losing it permanently. I know Doc had to take it down, but people will react to these things in different ways. My old favorite stand-by is to cut myself off from all contact.

It may take a while for me to get back into communication mode again.

Hey, try not to act too shocked. I isolated myself for 11 years and I am still at it for the most part.

The good news is I'm not addicted to morphine. I'm just stuck on it for life because my joints have self-destructed due to my CP...and they can't be salvaged for various complicated reasons. They couldn't take me off morphine even if I were addicted to it. That's how bad the pain situation is.

I am propping up my leg with a rolled up woolen shawl, but I have to be positioned just right and I still need the long acting morphine. I may still need the other type, it's too early to say. I am trying to reduce my pain to as little as possible any way I can, because I can't take it any more.

I want to have some semblance of a life again.

There is a thing more crippling than cerebral palsy: the prison of your own mind.