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Originally Posted by gracebuttercup
Hi. I am SO sorry this happened to you. I am hoping you will find someone who is more deserving of your good self ( I can feel from the words you wrote that you are a good person). I think of some processes as walking through the fires. So we can get to the other side. I am not sure though that a time limit can be put on it. I do respect that you want to move beyond the feelings of anger etc. Just as long as you do not push them aside. Sometimes that can be great for a while. Until its time to deal with them. I guess what I am saying is there is a process. And i think sometimes that process has its own timeline. Because it may be about also healing other stuff attached to the feelings about husband ( who did not desserve someone as good as you  )
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Hi Gracebuttercup. I know I am a good person despite all the mistakes I made when we were together (or what I perceive to be mistakes). We weren't together for very long. Only dated for about 10 months. I bent backwards and tried so hard to make him happy. Maybe I didn't understand him well enough to know what he needed or wanted from me. Then I started giving more than I should and received little in return. It made me look needy when I wasn't trying to be. Now everyone thinks that I can do better. I am moving forward but in a different way.
Today I am celebrating another year of life - I had many suicide attempts in the past year. It got so bad that I almost walked into a clinic to get help but I have CBT sessions to talk things through. Every move that I make, I always circle it back to the failed relationship. I wish I could stop but I'm just so used to doing this that it's become habitual. I hope this next year, I learn more about myself and let go of these negative things, because I know that it's just not me.