Sounds like you've been through a similar mess that I have with medication. I don't panic about them, but I am sure on the fence about taking them, possibly for the same reasons - after a lot of deliberation, I reluctantly started taking Viibryd about 8 weeks ago. On the positive side, it keeps me from crying, but on the negatives, the weight gain and sexual side-effects are again my reality. Prior to Viibryd I've been through Lexapro (twice), Wellbutrin, Remeron, Effexor, and Cymbalta...so, it's a mess of medication. Depression just sucks the life out of me.

If you can do this with therapy, that's a very good thing, and in my opinion, a good therapist will work with you and rely on referring you for medication as a last resort. I hope that you can find a good therapist...Best to you.