I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband almost a year ago and it has been the hardest part of my life. I also suffer from mental illness so I don't cope well with the smallest things. The only advice I can give you is watch your alcohol intake please! I have problems with addiction and after everything was over and people stop staying with me 24/7, I went straight to the bottle. It didn't turn out well. It's so hard to not want to numb the pain. Just make sure you have plenty of support and don't be afraid to ask for help. My thoughts are with you.
Just breathe