Most all theists feels they have the correct religion, the correct body of scripture, and the correct interpretations.And who knows out of hundreds of thousands of religions and millions of interpretations maybe you have hit the jackpot.
I've been delusional which I think bears some resemblance to being convicted in one's beliefs. Its devastating when one realizes they have put enormous emotion and energy into something that just isn't real.
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Anyway, I was just wondering if this illness (or whatever illness you're going through) has colored the way you feel about God, Source, etc.
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Yes, I found in my illness that I can be in opposition to what is real and feel justified and insightful even while being profoundly wrong about what is happening. I don't think its just me and other mentally ill people who can be that way. I think religions in general are shared delusions.
Now a lot of religious sentiment has valuable stuff about getting through life. I'm not out to wreck any psychological mechanism that is helping another person make it in this world. However, I don't take religious ideation as authoritative about anything, just as I hope people wouldn't accept my internal narrative I have about reality and purpose as authoritative.
If there is a God let him decloak and give substantive guidance to the 21st century. Ancient scriptures are essentially worthless except for people willing to read a lot into them like people did with the Sibylline prophecies. Sad fact is I think we are on our own. Happy fact, I think we can somewhat make it anyways.