You sound really really stressed out.
I sat here reading your post and I kept shaking my head yes. I know exacting what you are saying. Really really think twice before marrying this guy. One, he WILL not change and don't fool yourself into believing he will. Two, he does not have the same goals as you. You will spend your life trying to make him happy and he will be totally clueless. (All this is only personal experience talking)
TREAT YOURSELF
A day at the spa, a trip to the hair dressers, rent your favorite movie and watch it all day long. GO SHOPPING!
Just do something for yourself, you are worth it. You are important.