I was inpatient for three weeks (got out on Dec. 26th) of 2012. When I was in I was given over 10 different meds, and since then my meds have changed several times. I think I've been on close to 15 different medications. My current psych is awesome and has gotten me leveled out for long periods. But then I started rapid cycling again a couple of months ago. He's been working really hard to stabilize me again, but I've been at the extremes of the chart more than I ever was before. I was usually very depressed and had hypomanic episodes maybe once or twice a year. I thought I had never had a manic episode until I was in the hospital and pumped full of more meds than anyone else in the hospital. But my sessions with my therapist have helped me to realize I have hit full on manic episodes before. We think I was manic pretty much the whole time I was in BT in the Army. I shot up the chain and went from E1 to E4 (holding an E6 slot) in less than a year. There were also large purchases that I couldn't afford, etc. So...I went from Major Depressive Disorder to Bipolar once the manic episode was discovered during and after I got out of the hospital. This time I had an affair, which is on the top of my list of horrible things to do. I was the last person anybody thought would do that...and I lost all of my friends. Every one of them...except my best friend. My wife. I still can't understand why she fought so hard to get me back and out of the crazytown I was living in.

Anyway, the rapid cycling has been there for years as well apparently. My nickname in high school was "DL" (for D. L. Moody). I was know as the guy who would switch moods in mid-sentence.

Well...I think I've had enough of work today. I'm shutting down and heading home. I may just take a sick day tomorrow as well. Wow...this really sucks.

It's nice knowing there are others out there that can understand what I'm saying.