Whateverforever, it sounds like you've made a start in the most important way for your depression. Just starting therapy brings up many questions about how it should be done, and your T is figuring that out, too. Going once a week is a good place to start, with T available by phone in between. But it is hard to get through a whole week when you're depressed. If she is booked up, maybe another clinician could see you, too, to help get you through. Try not to be fooled by feeling better a few days so that you think you dont need therapy. Pondering suicide even once a month is a sign something is going on that's too much for you all on your own. Your T sounds very kind and supportive. And I think you're making good choices. It's important to tell the therapist what you feel you need as much as you dare, because, as smart as they are, they don't know all that you feel.