Yes Ive read the first and the last and working through the material in the last. The first I will read again as it was a long time ago. It is so hard when one has to be careful on how to talk to a partner with a short fuse. We either think I have to improve how I say it or shut up and out up but boundaries does give us a 3rd way. Boundaries would probably help you here as it talks about hiding from danger and distancing yourself physically is a way of setting boundaries. Ideally you should say something like "I'm going out, we can talk later when things are less heated." Of course in reality it's getting the words in edgewise and like anything you say just escalates it. But then at least you have removed yourself and he may well think about his response being unreasonable.