When I talk to people, I can't express myself good enough as I would when talking to myself in my mind. Conversation usually starts good but goes downhill once there's contradiction in discussion about something, or there's statement that I need to prove wrong, or other person does not understand what I mean and I hesitate to correct him but the biggest cause is when I mishear / don't understand what other person tells me and ask him to repeat but then if same happens again I feel huge tension inside to ask again because I think person will get angry at me or think I am fooling around.

This has been going since my first communications with people and it's when I noticed this lack in myself. I guess that is what made me introvert and isolated from people. There are some people that instill fear just by looking on them or hearing them on phone based on their tone. If person had bad day or in a bad mood, he usually will communicate this thrugh speech. Once anxiety or fear happens I lose the gift of speech, fail to communicate myself properly confusing "conclusion with introduction" and mix up words. I am not myself when I am alone, my thinking ability is supressed and I act like stranger from other planet, meaning I just have weird behaviour with worry on my face.

This does not always happen but when it does, I left thinking and worrying about it half day or until I slept well because communication is very important in this life, career etc.

I was even joking once asking if there's some kind of medicine that you can inject into yourself to temporarily cure this condition when you really need to perform like a sharp mind being immune to that anxiety, fear and worry...

I don't know if this is correct sub-forum for this topic so you are free to move it to the most releant forum. Thanks for your attention.