Hi guys,
I haven't had a formal diagnosis thus far, and because I'm only 18 - doctors are reluctant to diagnose.
I currently suffer from depression and am on Zoloft for it, I responded well to it although in the first week I was manic. I am coming off it as I really don't like the side effects, - now on 10mg and I am going back to 'normal' - aka, totally erratic and over emotional.
Now to the symptoms:

I have not yet had a relationship where I didn't cheat on my partner. I am disgustingly difficult to be with, severe idealisation/devaluation constantly, completely unpredictable and often contemplate suicide when a partner is late for seeing me, cancels or flirts with someone else. I sexualise myself constantly, my sexual identity is incredibly important. I fantasize about having sex with strangers, men and women, manipulating them into love with me and then to leave as if I was never there. I often threaten my boyfriends with suicide.
I have suffered with severe identity issues since I was little. I had an existential crisis at 13. I have had numerous physical images, ways of speaking, ways of thinking. It changes monthly. This impacts on my relationships - since I am so unstable, when I feel like someone has got to know me properly, I want to leave. I want to run away/move country. Because that puts me in a box, I can no longer change. I contemplate changing myself even more. I am utterly empty and constantly bored.
I am impulsive, but not to extremes. This is what makes me think I don't have BPD. I suffered from severe health anxiety in the past and so tend to be very cautious about how I act, except when I am depressed I have urges to play in traffic etc. I do binge eat sometimes but not badly. The same with self harm.
I have uncontrollable mood swings, severe irritability, mania, changes in the way I think, rapidity of thoughts, almost like a psychosis (I have experienced before, after using drugs).
I have intense anger which has caused me to smash up objects in my home, childlike tantrums monthly, urges to hurt others etc.
I was close to my dad briefly, even though he left my mum, but we lost contact for years and now we have a cold, emotionless relationship.
I have relatives with schizophrenia, also.
Is there any chance that somedays you can feel more 'borderline' than others? More sensitive or crazy?
There is much more I could mention but these I thought were the important bits.

Would appreciate literally any feedback!
Thanks guys.