My daughters father and I divorced when she was 6. 2 months later he remarried.. My daughter felt lost, the "step mom" hated that she existed, even tho she was well aware "Amanda" did in fact exist.

I had to step in and speak to my EX about how his own young daughter felt rejected unloved etc... He really didn't "get it" he was in the honeymoon phase with his new wife... I did request that my EX at least spend a meal and a few hours alone with her alone. He "tried"

Fast forward , Amanda is now about 11-12 ? She is fed up with the entire situation , her relationship with her father was shyt in general, his wife felt she could punish her when ever and for whatever , I stepped in at that point and told my Ex if he did not stop his wife from doing so I would stop visitation. He was the only person in that home that needs to handle these things.

She refused to go to his home or anywhere with him at all. Lasted over 6 months, would not even talk to him on the phone. He tried to talk her she dug her heels in and flat said no. I tried to get her to go back because she was letting his wife "win" .... That flipped a switch Amanda say that infact the woman had gotten what she wanted all along.

Amanda called her father and told him she wanted to see him alone, she was blunt and upfront with her discussion and feelings she told him exactly how mad she was, He finally "heard her" The resumed seeing each other and rebuilt there relationship.

Amanda took the high road, she was polite to his wife , but if she was rude to Amanda, Amanda would say " Ok I will be the adult here and not play your games" and walked away.

Amanda told her " I don't like you and you don't like me.... and that is fine. Respect needs to go both ways.

My daughter is now 22 , she still does not like her, but it's just stopped being an issue years before.

When I married my husband he had 3 boys, a few times when the boys were fighting and hubby wasn't home, I would step in and ask them to stop , or doing something that was harmful I stepped in... But, No its wasn't my place to be a parent, that was their Fathers job. I love his boys, they love me, but I am there Mom , they have a Mom.

My advice , Talk to your Dad , he's probably "clueless" and decide on boundaries and then bring her into the discussion so everyone is on the same page.

Im sorry your stuck in the middle of a difficult situation Speak up for yourself .