Well, the issue of taking responsibility resonates with me... There are indeed some part of what happened between me and my T that she did need to take responsibility for, but it was my transference that started the whole thing and she did admit to countertransference.
But yeah, transference/countertransference is subjective and confusing...
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'...
At poor peace I sing
To you strangers (though song
Is a burning and crested act,
The fire of birds in
The world's turning wood,
For my sawn, splay sounds,)
...'
Dylan Thomas, Author's Prologue
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