I have maternal transference with my T. as well. When I first told her about my strong feelings (loving like) towards her, she asked if I had heard of transference. I had looked it up. So, sometimes I feel love towards her, sometimes I think she is mad or frustrated at me and convinced she doesn't like me, sometimes I get easily mad at her and I've thought about quitting several times. One thing she said to me that was very helpful was "you're bringing me into it". She had JUST asked me some questions about my mom's apology on her deathbed. I completely felt like she was disappointed in me, mad and frustrated. As I was leaving and telling her she seemed mad at me, she said "you're bringing me into it". I thought about it all the next week and I WAS bringing her into it. All she did was ask me a few questions and it completely triggered me into feeling attacked.
Now I can almost tell when it's happening. I have to step back from the situation and see that she's NOT my mom and doesn't want to hurt me. She has pointed out several times that I keep waiting for her to hurt me, get mad, get frustrated, judge, etc. and she's right. I look for it and any little sign, I let her know.
I also went through a phase where I was convinced that she had changed. She didn't seem as compassionate, caring, interested. She told me that she hadn't changed. She asked if I saw her that way before my mom died and I said yes. She said when did it change and I said not long ago - she was pointing out that the transference was changing my perception of her.
As frustrating as it is, it gives the T. a great window into our childhoods and our processes outside of therapy. I hated every minute of the intensity of it, but I have learned SO MUCH about myself. I would say I'm now on the other end of it - it's not near as strong and I'm more aware. It will come and go for awhile from what I hear but I feel better about it.
I totally acted like a teenager with her! I recently told her the stages of transference seems like the stages of childhood and she agreed. In my teenager stage I was more rebellious (wanting to drink more, didn't care if something happened to me, etc.) and argued with her a lot. Kept telling her everything she was doing wrong. I would say now I've leveled out.