The last time I lost weight it was by a process of consuming no more than a set amount of daily calories, estimating calories of everything I ate and tallying calories on scratch paper each day. I eventually became weary of doing that, and usually wound up not being able to eat anything in evenings having reached my max at dinner. Also, I took daily walks. Since then, I've gained considerable weight after quitting that, especially after taking less walks. Like you, I like to casually eat without thinking too much about it. Maybe I'll try a gym membership.