My spouse has a cronic medical condition that i dont understand, but its not like we are at each others throats. I think the basic frustration is that people think its all under our control and some is, some isn't. Also, on the topic of coming out. I recently did in front of a classroom of people. In a way I do regret it. One person in the class kept saying "high functioning bipolar" about a particular individual. For some reason that irritated me to the point that I couldn't control the impulse to say something. I don't even know why, but it bugged me. Thank you all so much for the responses. Thinking about your comments has helped me work though this.