I'm not sure if I'm posting this to the correct forum, but oh well.

Do you guys get a lot of these thoughts? I have them many times everyday.Sometimes they are very intense, with a huge amount of feeling, and sometimes they are more detached without any real emotion.

I just went to the shop and I thought some variation of 'I just want to die' countless times. It didn't have much energy to it though, and I wasn't at risk of harming myself. Sometimes I get so dissociated and have the thoughts in such a detached emotionless way that it feels like I am floating; as though I am not here, and other times it's the opposite and the thoughts stem from a tidal wave of emotion that feels like its literally crushing me..

Do any of you get this everyday? (And please don't say 'go see a doctor' because seeing doctors was a huge part of what caused these current issues to begin with. Plus i already have a psychiatrist.)

I think this general sense of wanting to die is due to everything that has happened. I think its a post traumatic stress thing, but i didn't post this on that forum because it seems people don't go on that forum as frequently as this one

Does anyone get what I'm saying? xx