I'm certain I slipped into a full manic episode this time. I did something that could jeopardize everything. I seriously thought I was just looking for closure or something, but it didn't turn out like I imagined (of course). So...that's how you know you've gone too close to the sun, right? When your actions become reckless and lack reason. Now I am scared to the point of panic attacks that I'll lose my wonderful wife. My moods are just becoming too much for her, and I can't blame her for losing the battle.

Thanks for letting me spill it out. It really feels good to be able to throw things like this out to people who just know.