It sounds like she's lashing out at you because he's still pursuing you (if I read that correctly). Her anger is partially misdirected. Also, it sounds like someone needs to take him out back and introduce him to the game of t-ball.
That slime needs to leave you alone. This is only my opinion, I would make sure that both of them understood, under no uncertain terms, that he is not to &^%$ing contact you even if the %$#&ing world is burning! If he keeps it up, you might want to consider a restraining order against him to show him you're serious about it.
And why is your husband okay with him contacting you in that way?