Was the death unexpected?

After my father passed away unexpectedly several years ago of a heart attack and I started having panic attacks and having a high degree of anxiety when I thought about death and all the ways I could just up and die with no warning. I also developed a phobia of flying, which I strongly associate with death (even though my dad didn't die in an airplane, go figure). The panic attacks went away with therapy and time, but I still carry quite a bit of anxiety around with me especially about death. Death, for the most part, is out of our control and is a lot of times unpredictable. It took me a long time to accept that it is out of my control and I think it helps me to know that death comes to everyone and it's important to live my life fully because you just don't know.

It still causes me some anxiety, but I don't lose sleep over it anymore either. It may definitely be part of your grief process, but it may help to talk to a therapist and maybe get something to help with the panic attacks.